I was asked a while back to define what an internet “Stalker” is.
I have had my experiences with people who were irrating, judgmental and often persistent above and beyond reason and I had referred to many of them as “Stalkers”… but now I have come to realize (after doing a little more research) that perhaps I was dealing more with “trolls”.
“Huh?” Some might ask, “What’s a Troll?”
Allow me to educate those of you who have been besieged by SPAMMERS, STALKERS & TROLLS and provide a way to deal with each more effectively… Perhaps some will even find that they themselves qualify as one of these and will curb their “Spamminess”, “Stalkiness” or “trolliness” (LOL).
Let’s begin with SPAMMERS.
Internet spam is one or more unsolicited 1 messages, sent or posted as part of a larger collection 2 of messages, all having substantially identical content. 3
SPAM then is like “junk mail” and can appear on comments as continuous unwanted advertising . It could come as E-mail trying to sell you something or in the case of Reader boards it seems to apply to people repeating the same message over and over and over and over and over (ad infinitum) which might vary in content but usually might as well equal “LOOK AT ME!”, “LOOK AT ME!”, “LOOK AT ME!”.
The Origin of the word “SPAM” came from an old Monty Python (The 70’s British Comedy Show) bit in which a waitress in a restaurant offers only meals that somehow include the word “SPAM” in each and every offering.. Eventually resulting in a song famous among we “geeks” and “nerds” (LOL).
Eventually when the internet took off these “Python Fans” became “Star Wars” fans and formed communities on the Net to discuss such Topics as “ What would have happened if things had not worked out as planned for the Rebel Forces?"
Anyway, These communities eventually found that they were invaded by kids who could only seem to type a single idea or word over and over and to shut them up the “chatters” would eventually start typing the word “SPAM” over and over while singing together the Monty Python classic.
Most of us are all too familiar with SPAM and I’ve covered it before in another Blog.. So let us move on to…
..INTERNET “STALKERS”.
I was sort of surprised by what I found because I had assumed all internet stalkers were evil electronic marauders who sat around finding ways to make life difficult.. But that definition more accurately applies to TROLLS.
According to Wiki… Stalking is defined as follows:
Stalking (from Middle English stalk: from Old English bestealcian; akin to Old English stelan to steal) is a legal term for repeated harassment or other forms of invasion of a person's privacy in a manner that causes fear to its target.
Statutes vary between jurisdiction but may include such acts as:
repeated physical following
unwanted contact (by letter or other means of communication)
observing a person's actions closely for an extended period of time
contacting family members, friends, or associates inappropriately
Stalking can also include seeking and obtaining the person's personal information in order to contact them; e.g. looking for their details on computers, electoral rolls, personal files and other material with the person's personal details without their consent. Personal details include their date of birth, marital status, home address, email address, telephone number (landline and mobile), where they work, or which school, college or university they go to; and personal information on their family and friends and any other sensitive and confidential information (e.g. medical conditions and disabilities etc.)
cyberstalking
According to the United States National Center for Victims of Crime, one out of every 12 women and one out of every 45 men will be stalked during their lifetime.
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At its mildest, a stalker is simply a troll that has attached itself to an individual. At worst, boring, at best, flattering.
But a stalker can be a serious predator, using the Internet to pursue a real or imagined vendetta, or other perverted agenda. Risk assessment is an essential first step.
How dangerous is it?
Start by thinking about who it is; is it someone you have simply upset on the Internet, someone with whom you've had a relationship? Is it someone you knew before, or have met in the real world?
Think about where you see it - newsgroups? forums? chat rooms? email?
What does it say? Is it a matter of direct insults? Is it lies and rumors? Does it reveal information not generally known that you want kept secret?
When - and how often - does it appear?
How is it threatening? Is it simply annoying, or do you fear direct contact, betrayal or what?
Think about the worst it can do ... how bad is that?
Why are you being stalked - is it simply spite and boredom, is it envy or resentment?
Have you done anything that you think may have set it off?
Once you can answer these questions, you will have a clearer idea of what you are dealing with, and how quickly you may need to act.
What To Do ------------
In virtually every case, the first line of defense is to do nothing; simply treat it as a troll and ignore it - most will go away fairly quickly. remember, these creatures are a form of troll; if they fail to get rapid feedback, their inclination is to move on- they usually have neither the stamina nor the intelligence for a difficult situation.
But - however mild this stalker appears - always save every message you receive. A good way to do this is to create a new folder in your mailbox, and move all mails or copy newsgroup postings to that folder. I'd advise keeping this folder for at least a year after the last post, possibly longer. This can be a useful store of evidence, if later required, and can help in identifying the stalker.
Consider your options. Retaliation will make you feel better, but can be risky; as it make inspire, provoke or enable the stalker to strike further. For example, using the stalker's guestbook to warn them is risky if you have a guestbook that is open to attack. But if it is reasonably safe, then attack - let the stalker know that you are not afraid of electrons!
By definition, a stalker is a coward, like all bullies, like all who attack from behind, or in the dark. Be sure to mention this in every attack.
Stalkers make it personal - You make it impersonal. Minimize any private response you make; maximize every public response.
Not invariably, but usually, stalkers are none too bright; as JR would say, "The Elevator Don't Reach the Top Floor" - few intelligent people would go down the road to stalksville. Some, of course, are severely mentally ill. If you suspect that, then do not engage the stalker in any kind of dialog - just keep careful records and make appropriate reports.
Be Reasonable - Your attacks should be in response to the stalker's - and their first line of defense will be to accuse you of stalking - so don't go over the top. You'll usually be amazed how easy it is to attack a stalker, but exercise restraint. If they write in your forum, and it's safe to respond - then write in theirs. But be honest, brief and to the point - even if you post in every thread.
Keep records of all that you do, as well as what they do - and consider writing a web diary, or opening a web page to expose them. They may well have a reputation to lose - if they deserve to lose it, help them to lose it.
Share The Laughter - However unnerving a stalker may be, if you look at them coldly in the light of day, they are pretty ridiculous. Some are Nothing But Ridiculous. Savor that; turn it around, let them - and the world - see how ridiculous they are. Every time you mock them, you gain, and they lose. Share The Laughter.
Be consistent - once you have identified their weaknesses (besides being a loopy, cowardly person), use the information against them, in every response.
Then we get to THE TROLL...
The best way to know what a Troll is, is to see what they do.
ALL Trolls crave attention. That is the sole reason they exist - whether or not they want to feel that they have achieved something (even if it is destruction) or to be recognized for doing something deviant, they want just a little attention in their direction.
Remember: Without attention, Trolls are nothing. They have no audience, and no victim.
The mentality of a Troll is obvious - he wants a cheap laugh, and that is all. The offense that may be caused is of no concern to him, as are any other ramifications for any actions they might take.
Trolls are a nuisance. They purposefully cause annoyance to other users, but their approach can, and does, vary. Some trolls are obvious, some are not.
Some Trolls will pose as regular members of a forum - either by pretending to be someone else, or by joining in some conversations, letting their subversiveness slip through very slowly.
For example, one Troll started by joining in some conversations on the alt.movies.spielberg group. "Togetherinparis" slowly began to lie, about progressively implausible situations, until eventually most regular posters left the group.
Now, several years on, the Troll appears to be the only person left in the group - still proclaiming that he came up with the ideas for Minority Report, The Force (as in Star Wars) and Close Encounters of the Third Kind.
How is the best way to deal with this? It may be difficult to recognize his lies to begin with, and then it is easy to fall into the trap of outright believing him.
As soon as you recognize a Liar, don't try to get him to prove his facts - it's impossible… and he knows this.
You may like to try to draw him into a sensible conversation, without dropping to his level.
But, ultimately, there can be only one way to deal with him: Killfile him. Do not let yourself be seduced into having an argument over the validity of his "facts".
Other Trolls will try to draw you into a futile argument by a variety of means, but usually by saying something controversial.
A Trolls message may be as simple as "Prove that God does not exist" that has been cross posted to a range of religious newsgroups. A Troll is usually identifiable, as he will often refuse to take a stance on either side - at one time arguing that God exists, and another that He doesn't.
These Trolls are Controversial.
A Trolls message will often be cross-posted to one or more newsgroups that have nothing to do with the subject.
By clicking here you can read a Troll thread that spanned for more than four hundred messages - just because it was a controversial subject, and in spite of the fact that the subject had nothing to do with one of the forums in which it was posted.
Trolls revel in their threads lasting such a long time - the longer a thread is, the more legitimate users have been sucked into their little game.
All Trolls, Controversial, Liars, Bored and Confrontationalists use "Logical Fallacies" - in other words, they lie, change their minds, or otherwise simply claim any perspective other than the consensus.
Logical Fallacies can be a legitimate form of discussion in many instances. But Trolls can use this to their advantage, suggesting that fallacies arise in their "opponents" arguments, where, in truth, those fallacies may, or may not exist.
OK.. Not all the Spammers, Stalkers or Trolls mean to be what they are.
Most are not even aware they are one of these things and we must still attempt to always be as compassionate as possible because in some cases it’s a mental illness (OCD) and in others it is just a desire to be acknowledged and recognized.
One of the funniest sites I found while researching this topic was that is actually a funny web-site that allows a person to actually “ADOPT A STALKER”..LOL.. And actually mentions the benefits (in jest) of having one of your very own.
If you would like your very own Stalker go to : http://members.aol.com/deejpearls/stalker_adopt.html
This article is the result of curiosity and a desire to learn and should not be taken to point a finger at anyone specifically..
…Well, then ..um… maybe that dude that keeps showing up on Adrianne Curry’s MySpace Blog who leaves huge lists of missing children and occasionally contacts me to say “I’ve stolen his job and need to ask Adri for money to give to him” does come to mind…
…but now I realize he is not so much a “Stalker” as a TROLL.. And typical of Trolls I suppose he is merely trying to collect a TOLL to cross some imaginary bridge.
BE LOVE & BE LOVED!
JoZ
