Tuesday, August 12, 2008
MY MINISTRY EXPLAINED ..sort of...a bit ODDLY!.
Although THIS BLOG is fairly new I felt it time here to tell you a little bit about how I arrived here. I won't share in detail for now but i will say that if I were to write the story of my life it would sound so incredible that most would think it was just Fiction.
I have considered writing a book AS fiction (based on my true story) and perhaps calling it.. "Once I figured out who I was even I did not believe it"... but let me just give you some basic information and I will save the details for another time (if we have enough time before.. well.. i digress).
I was born May 2nd , 1961 in Hollywood California and moved to Corvallis Oregon at age 6 .. I was a very creative child that grew up in a nurturing and loving family and had been involved in church activities and religious organizations for as long as I can recall.
My mother says that age 3 she walked in on standing on a chair with a Readers Digest (as my Bible) preaching to a congregation of stuffed animals neatly arranged before me. She told me once that I was preaching things far wiser than a 3-year old but I must admit I only vaguely recall any of this.. but perhaps that was the first sign of my destiny.
I had a deep love of everything. I was raised in Love and really knew nothing BUT LOVE until I entered grade school and found out there was actually something called "Hate".
I was a hyper-sensitive child and was easily hurt emotionally (still am).. Yet I never felt that if I was attacked that it was necessary to ever strike back.
I still find it hard to understand how people can be so selfish and mean to others. Nor do I understand why people feel the need to be vindictive if they have been abused (In my logic to counter attack only seems to justify the actions of the original aggressor and only amplifies and magnifies the battle).
The impulse for revenge was foreign to me and I suppose that is because I am a peacemaker by nature and I talk AND WALK what I believe in and i believe in LOVE!
LOVE IS KIND, PATIENT, JOYFUL, COMPASSIONATE and OTHER CENTERED. It is easy to love someone who loved you back but the true test of love is to "love one's enemy" which means loving somebody who may despise or abuse you,, See, I actually have this kind of Love and as a child I assumed everyone else did too.. But now i have come to realize how very RARE this is.
Anyway as I grew up I would later become the Youngest accepted "Good News Club" teacher in the country, Become a "Young Life" Councilor, Teach Sunday School, Be appointed Head Usher and from the age of 14 on until I was in my 30's I was a guest speaker at many various churches where I performed "Gospel Puppetry and Magic" and gave talks on various religious topics (such as Demonology, the Occult, Psychics and general "Get to know Jesus" evangelistic stuff.
Add to that 2 years spent going to a Christian middle school (Zion Lutheran School) and taking many various specialized classes such as "learning your Spiritual Gifts", "Spiritual Warfare" and many others.
I actually came to many times in my life where i began to view the Church as a business (and the way they are handled now they are). I often would lose direction and suffer burn-out and even at one time wondered if it was all a big crock of "donkey doo". I had spoken in many varied churches.. studied world religions and realized that there were so many who had varying opinions and faith yet all claimed THEIRS was the Biblical view and all others were in error.
I was a person who LOVED LOVE and seeing so many people who stated clearly that "GOD IS LOVE" and claimed the "LOVE OF GOD" as the most important thing to believe would then turn the next moment and be so filled with hatefulness and judgement that hellfire speaking that I eventually stopped hanging around the hypocrites.. I began to realize more LOVE was had around the infidels where God or No God they did not constantly analyze me and try to play that "God told me to tell you" BS that suggests that I am unable to hear My God on my own.. and that is VERY OFFENSIVE TO ME... as is anyone calling anyone else a "sinner" or speaking only in what I refer to as "Christianese" (I will blog on that odd language soon).
No one called by god for a purpose gets an ez ride... Especially if God has a message you are to carry forward that from DAY 1 you know most won't immediately buy.. because folks after careful study I arrived at which church was THE CHURCH and as I looked around.. IT DID NOT ANY LONGER EXIST ON THE EARTH. Well, it does but nobody is doing it right.. again , big subject so we will cover that another time.
Anyway, lets move forward to the day August 11th 1999. This day was even marked by an astronomical event and was so amazing it changed my entire way of thinking and viewing everything I had been taught about God. I have told this story before and will cover it again but I will say that in one night I went from walking down a path of self-destruction to realizing the nature of what my calling was to be.
Then began a series of events even more amazing.. each unique.. nothing typical; and each contained elements of mystery, allegory and miracle.. Eventually I came "heart to heart" with YHWH/God and what I experienced is beyond earthly description. I suppose it must have been what Moses saw and called the "Burning Bush" (funny how people naturally literalize it and think it's a real BUSH..LOL.. But I suppose one might say it sort of looks bushy .. sort of.. kind of.. well, It's wondrous when God honors you through some event that makes whatever doubt you have go away.
One interesting fact is that I recall very few "Words" actually spoken by God.. One might say each single word was as a library.. so when I heard "Behold my Heart My Son"... I guess those 5 words were like going to college in a single moment.. it's very hard to explain .. I have no real proof and so i share it only to give you my own experience (and in my view of reality you may have an almost entirely diametric view and we can still both be right).. I do not share this to show off or claim superiority.. But what i do is so difficult that it took some amazing events and that to convince me (I have in my journal most of the odd "coincidences?" which alone mean nothing.. YET TOGETHER WHAT THEY SAY TO ME IS "THE MAJORITY OF PEOPLE ARE NOT REALLY UNDERSTANDING OF WHO GOD AND JESUS ARE" and over time I was challenged over and over to really examine truth.
Let me explain my dilemma in my ministry as an odd but fun parable
(I like Parables)
Once there was a being named Zooj who lived on a world called Hiag..
There were other Zeebas living on Haig and they seemed just like him in every way and he lived just like every other Zeeba.
On the planet Hiag there was an old belief that one day a something named ZOOBA would come and in that coming he would provide wisdom that was essential to save the planet Haig during a time of crisis.
It was actually just that simple BUT while the Zeeba's were waiting they began to tell stories about the coming of ZOOBA.
..Zeebas live a long long time so over the years the story grew and grew and with each telling the ZOOBA became greater and greater and eventually they started writing the stories down only some stories conflicted with the others and each story teller thought that "their story" was the best and most true.
"ZOOBA will come and bring zingers and whoopies and he will bring them in a huge sack which will fit the world and protect it" said one zeeba Story Teller.
"Hogwash" said another Story Teller "You are wrong and you need to get it right or be sent to LEEH where you will be eaten by Flambats .. I alone can save you because I have the holy "whacca whacca stick" that gives me the absolute right to speak for the mighty ZOOBA and True believers in ZOOBA must only eat hibby berries and drink pugganubby wine or Zooba will not like them"
"I" argued a third Story Teller " Am the most anointed "Whickey Hickey", keeper of the divine name which cannot be spoken and you are both wrong for you must not even speak the name of THE GREAT ONE or when he comes he will float down out of the sky and kill all those who said the Holy name.. and who failed to purchase the "Scroll of Linkytoowhappi" written by the prophet NICKY NOO who is the one and only knower of THE GREAT ONE whose name cannot be spoken... Come to MY WAY or Both of you shall die at the hand of "He whose name cannot be spoken."
Zooj believed in Zooba and went to see the three story keepers to see which might be correct.
He carefully.. first he examined the legends of the "Zingers and whoopies and the sack of protection".. He tried using the "Whacca Whacca stick" and kept a strict diet of hibby berries and pugganubbi wine and he read thoroughly the "Scroll of Linkytoowhappi".
It was confusing but he gave each an equal and fair opportunity in order to see if perhaps any of the Story Tellers stories contained the truth so he would know Zooba when he came... but eventually he gave up and approached all three and said, "I am so tired and I do not like fighting and argument.. nor do i like the tastes of the berries and the Scroll is written so every third word is blacked out so that it is barely legible.. Look guys, I love Zooba .. I believe Zooba is coming... but after studying each of your stories and trying all your rituals and foods i don't think any of you have it right.
All three turned from arguing with each other and scowled at Zooj... The three shook their hands in unison angerly calling him a "blasphemer" a "fool" and a "heretic" and for a moment it seemed they all agreed for once (if but for only a moment)...
Zooj stood before them.. his head hanging as in shame .. but it was not shame.. rather Zooj felt abused and hurt and singled out as being wrong by everyone... yet inwardly something felt right about telling the Story Tellers they were wrong... Indeed it took great strength to stand against the traditions of the Story Tellers because in Zeeba culture to not follow at least one of the Stories was to disrespect the entire culture of Haig.
Eventually the three story keepers stopped harassing Zooj and began once again arguing among each other.
As Zooj left he thought "surely if Zooba is so great he would not wish to be around all that noise and anger."
So Zooj went out into the empty distant fields where he could be alone to consider if perhaps he might just figure out which Story teller offered the path closest to what he believed...and .... JUST THEN ...a corked bottle fell from the sky and almost landed on Zooj's head.
Zooj looked down and it had a tag on it reading:
"TO ZOOJ - OPEN AT ONCE AND READ".
"This is odd" thought Zooj, "Normally Bottles do not fall from the sky with my name on them".
At first Zooj feared it might be a trick of one ...or all ...of the Story tellers.
Perhaps it was telling him he would be killed.
Maybe it had a curse on it.
Maybe they put poison gas in the bottle and when he opened it he would be dead.
Zooj stayed in the open fields for days staring and thinking and fearful of what the paper in the bottle was but eventually his curiosity got the best of him so he opened it and with a sigh that he was not harmed he read:
" Dearest Zooj, I am your real father and you are really not a Zeeba.. You may look as a Zeeba and act as a Zeeba and even think as a Zeeba.. but I wanted you to first understand what it is to BE a Zeeba before I gave you this message. You see you are really a SESUJ and your real name is...
Yes, YOU ARE ZOOBA..."
Zooj's mouth dropped open and he almost dropped the note in shock... Zooj considered if perhaps this was some joke or trap.. certainly if HE was ZOOBA then the three storytellers were only "telling stories" because to be Zooba he needed no Sticks.. he required no Scrolls. He did not have to follow any weird ritual laws to be who he is/was..
ZOOBA just needed to BE ZOOBA.
He resumed reading:
"... My Son.. you were brought here to save the planet Haig and now I can tell you from what.. Every Billion years a huge space monster called a LEVID visits the Planet Haig searching for food and he has a great appetite for the ZEEBA's.. now this being is too big to fight and if he even sees a Zeeba it is a goner.. So what I ask you to do is tell them that on Noiz Hill there is huge cave my people carved and then hid til the proper time. Go and tell all on Haig that will listen that just before the Levid comes you are to hide in the cave for 3 and a half days and by then the Levid will be gone and all will be well for then next Billion Years. Thank You my son and after this is over i will come and get all who wish to come and visit our world where you are actually a prince and future king. Your Dad KING OHAJHAV
Freaked out but excited Zooj ran back into town. It was ZOOBADAY and Zooj (well ZOOBA) ran from temple to temple saying..
"Look , I am here.. My Father gave me this note and told me the truth about ZOOBA.. and it's ME.. IM ZOOBA.. but that's not what matters.. I..."
Suddenly Zooba was grabbed by all three Story Tellers and they carried him into a room.
"Have you gone Mad?" asked one story teller.
"Do you realize what you are doing?" asked the second.
"You have uttered the name of he who must not be named and by our law you must die" said the third.
"But, look I have this note that dropped from the sky and" started Zooba.
One of the Story Tellers grabbed the note and read it.
"This is a fraud" said the First Story Teller.
The second Story teller took the Note and read it.
He added "Our belief says nothing about a letter"
The Third Story Teller grabbed it and pushed it to Zooba's face.. "Where are all the blacked out words? and Look someone has written the name.. we must kill him for this!" and with that he tossed the letter into the fire.
"Well, we don't need to go that far" said the first Story teller and it began their endless argument over who was right.
Meanwhile Zooba ran into the streets yelling "PLEASE EVERYONE>> I AM ZOOBA AND YOU NEED TO FOLLOW ME TO THE HIDING PLACE MY FATHER PREPARED FOR ALL OF US SO HAIG MAY CONTINUE!
A few curious people listened and fewer still followed.. The majority of those who arrived were not followers of the Story Tellers and some even hated the very name "Zooba".. But because this guy was so hated by the Story Tellers they gave him a chance while those who awaited the coming of Zooba did not believe it could possibly be the one they knew as "Zooj".
Those who went into the cave in the hill of Nioz never actually saw what the LEVID looked like but somewhere it is said you cand still hear arguements and debates coming from the belly of the Beast called LEVID.
This is but a tale.. a silly story to amuse you.. then again I will let you consider if it might be more (INSERT TWIGHLIGHT ZONE MUSIC HERE)
BE LOVE & BE LOVED!